Got It Memorized?
by Saberrrrrrr
Summary: Roxas is dealing with a lot of.. angst. He seems to think that he has feelings for Axel, which is highly unlikely considering he has no heart to feel with. Yaoi. Probably a lemon coming soon. I can't help that I'm a dirty whore who likes to write smut D8


"Got it memorized?"

Of course I had it memorized. I had everything about Axel memorized. Down to the last flaming red spike on his head, and the way his careless laughter would ring in my ears forever. It was so weird to have this feeling… feeling. There was that word again. There was no way this could be a feeling; I didn't have a heart to feel with. _But maybe I'm different. _That seemed to always come up when I was talking with other organization members. Maybe I had a little piece of a heart left inside of me and that's why the Kingdom Key chose me. But even if that were true it wouldn't matter; Axel still didn't have a heart.

The fact that he has no heart kills me, and that keeps me going when it comes to fighting Heartless. Ever since I noticed something change inside of me whenever I was around Axel it had always been for him. One day we would have hearts and he could return my… what exactly was it that I wanted from him?"

"Hey, kid, did you hear me?" Axel interrupted my thoughts.

"Oh… Yeah." He took a bite of his sea salt ice cream and looked at me for a moment that felt like an eternity.

"You okay, man? You're acting like you have feelings or something crazy like that." He chuckled as he slapped my back, nearly making me topple off the clock tower.

"Right… I don't have those. What are you even talking about?" I laughed it off. I could brood over it later; for now I would just appreciate the time I had alone with Axel. I decided since Xion hadn't shown up I could use this opportunity to my advantage. I made an audible yawn and leaned to my right where Axel was sitting. He didn't seem to mind that I was leaning on him so I laid my head on his shoulder also.

"Tough mission today?" He asked as he took another bite.

"The worst! The Heartless in Halloweentown were relentless today." I lied. There was actually only a few that I ran into, and they were no trouble at all.

"Hmm. It should get better soon. Xemnas told me the other day that we were getting really close to completing Kingdom Hearts."

"And you believe him?" I asked skeptically. Xemnas would have said that even if they were no where near finished.

"I have to, Roxas. It's the only thing I have to look forward to." His voice seemed so close to my ear that I almost shivered.

"I thought you said you looked forward to eating ice cream with me." I said, slightly offended.

"Well, yeah. You know I do. It's just… the one thing that I long for, the one thing that I would give anything for… Is a heart." Axel's voice seemed almost sad, if he could have had an emotion.

"But if you don't have a heart, how can you long for one?"

"I'm not sure. Maybe it's a memory from when I did have a heart. It must have been a strong feeling… longing for something… or someone."

A pang shot through me at the thought of Axel being in love with someone.

We had long since finished our ice cream, but we still sat there, me leaning against his arm. After a while, I started to doze off although I didn't notice. I was immersed into a wonderful dream. A dream where Axel and I was sitting on the clock tower, holding hands and expressing our feelings. When I leaned against his chest I could hear his heart beating in rhythm with mine. I looked up at him just in time to see him leaning forward. The foreign beating in my chest started getting faster with my anticipation.

I woke up alone in my room. I stared blankly at the dull, uninviting gray hues that saturated the walls around me. I laid back down and went over the dream in my head, reflecting on every detail: the sound of Axel's heart beat, the way his eyes seemed to glisten, and the way my dream body reacted to his.

Axel must have carried me here. I closed my eyes as I imagined him carrying me bridal style with my head against his chest, and then he would lay me down gently. And then… he would lightly press his lips to my forehead as he pulled the blankets up to cover me up. I felt a light blush form on my cheeks as I mentally shook myself. That would never happen.

Author's comment: There will be more chapters! This is one is basically just Roxas being emo. :3 Please write me a review! :D


End file.
